Open with Care

21 & above

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From: Rajesh @ Sasken Communication Technologies (Bangalore)
Kiranmayi @ Adecco (Bangalore)

Today's CARTOON

UKG EXAM (Hilarious)
From: Kiranmayi @ Adecco (Bangalore)

Today's SMS

Teacher tells a student a=b, b=c implies a=c
Tell me an example
Student : I love u - u love your daughter - so I love your daughter.

Today's ART
Palestinian art

World's Largest Keyboard

Today's ADVERTISEMENT
Small But Tough

Just Facts
From: Prabhakar.T @ Covansys (Chennai)

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is the fear of long words
Months that begin on a Sunday will always have a "Friday the 13th
The average lead pencil will draw a line 35 miles long or write approximately 50,000 English words
Human thigh bones are stronger than concrete
Your ribs move about 5 million times a year, everytime you breathe
One quarter of the bones in your body, are in your feet
In Alaska, it is legal to shoot bears. However, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited

What's the purpose of the little pocket in the right front pocket of jeans?

From: Anitha @ Fidelity (Bangalore)

Watches! Back in the day before the wrist became multi-functional, folks carried pocket watches. These were fastened to the end of chains, and stored in special pockets woven into pants or vests. Levi's 501s, originally introduced in 1890, featured watch pockets. And sure enough, it was found that these vintage jeans from the 1970s listed as having "five pocket styling with watch pocket."

FIFA World cup 2006 Electronic Chart
From: Rajarajan @ Tech Mahindra (Singapore)

>>> Download <<< ( Excel - 0.41 MB )

Presence of MIND

From: Anitha @ Fidelity (Bangalore)

John works in a supermarket. A man came in and asked John for half a kilogram of butter. The boy told him they only sold 1 kg packets of butter, but the man was persistent. The boy said he'd go ask his manager what to do.
John walked into the back room and said, "There's a bloody fellow out there who wants to buy only half a kilo of butter."
As he finished saying this he turned around to find the man standing right behind him,So he added, "And this gentleman wants to buy the other half."
The manager finished the deal and later said to John, "You almost got yourself in a lot of trouble earlier, but I must say I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of it. You think on your feet, and I like it a lot.Which place are you from?"
John replied, "I'm from Mexico, sir."
"Oh really? Why did you leave Mexico?" asked the manager.
John replied, "They're all just prostitutes and soccer players up there."
"My wife is from Mexico," the manager said.
John replied, "Which team did she play for?"

India these days

Today's CREATIVITY

THE MAGIC ELEVATOR

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, "What is this, Father?"
The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is." While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous, voluptuous 24-year-old blonde woman stepped out. The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son,
"Go get your mother."

Today's ADVERTISEMENT
DONT SNEEZE

Please pack my new blue silk pyjamas

A man called home to his wife and said, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss & several of his friends. We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting, so could you please pack enough clothes for a week and set out my rod and fishing box? We're leaving from the office & I will swing by the house to pick my things up" "Oh! Please pack my new blue silk pyjamas."
The wife thinks this sounds a bit fishy but being the good wife she is, did exactly what her husband asked. The following weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking good. The wife welcomed him home and asked if he caught many fish?
He said, "Yes! Lots of Salmon, some Bluegill, and a few Swordfish.But why didn't you pack my new blue silk pyjamas like I asked you to do?"
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The wife replied, "I did. They're in your fishing box.....

World's Greatest Suicide

Today's ILLUSION

I will EAT all this stuff

A new vacuum cleaner salesman knocked on the door on the first house of the street.
A tall lady answered the door.
Before she could speak, the enthusiastic salesman barged into the living room and
opened a big black plastic bag and poured dirty things onto the carpet.
"Madam, if I could not clean this up with the use of this new powerful vacuum cleaner,
I will EAT all this stuff!", exclaimed the eager salesman.
“Do you need chilli sauce or ketchup with that" asked the lady.
The bewildered salesman asked, "Why, madam?"
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"We just moved in, & there's no electricity in the house!"

Today's ADVERTISEMENT

Today's ADVERTISEMENT

Today's CARTOON

Today's INFO
From: Anitha @ Fidelity (Bangalore)

Why do people throw rice or grains at a couple when they get married?
Throwing things at a newly married couple is a very old tradition that may date back to ancient Rome or Egypt or even further back. The custom is intended to give newlyweds good luck, and most of the items thrown at the couple represent fertility and abundance. Food has always been a popular choice because it symbolizes plentiful crops. Seeds and nuts symbolize fertility because a little seed may grow into a big plant, an appropriate sentiment for a newly married couple. Grains such as wheat and rice were thrown over the newlyweds in the hopes that the couple would be prosperous and have many children to work the land.

R U DRUNNK...??

S....H..A.RING

A little old couple walked slowly into a McDonald's one cold winter evening. They looked out of place amid the young families and young couples eating there that night. Some of the customers looked admiringly at them. You could tell what the admirers were thinking:
"Look, there is a couple who has been through a lot together, probably for 60 years or more!"
The little old man walked up to the cash register, placed his order with no hesitation and then paid for their meal.The couple took a table near the back wall and started taking food off of the tray. There was one hamburger, one order of french fries and one drink.The little old man unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half.He placed one half in front of his wife. Then he carefully counted out the french fries, divided them in two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife. He took a sip of the drink, and then his wife took a sip as the man began to eat his few bites.
Again, you could tell what people around the old couple were saying. - "They were used to sharing everything."
Then the crowd noticed that the little old lady still hadn't eaten a thing.She just sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally sipped some of the drink. A young man came over and begged them to let him buy them another meal.The lady explained that no, they were used to sharing. As the little old man finished eating and was wiping his face neatly with a napkin, the young man could stand it no longer and asked again.After being politely refused again, he finally asked the little old lady, "Ma'am, why aren't you eating. You said that you share everything.
What is it that you are waiting for?"
She answered,

"THE TEETH"

Today's ILLUSION

Did I read the sign right?

In an office:
TOILET OUT OF ORDER...... PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Spotted in a safari park:
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)

Today's ART

Today's ADVERTISEMENT
The Economist

Very Interesting........yet true

A person will die from total lack of sleep sooner than from starvation. Death will occur about 10 days without sleep, while starvation takes a few weeks.
Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.
Alexander Graham Bell, the inventor of the telephone, never telephoned his wife or mother because they were both deaf.
Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different.
Right handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left handed people do.
According to Genesis 1:20-22, the chicken came before the egg.
If you leave Tokyo by plane at 7:00am, you will arrive in Honolulu at approximately 4:30pm the previous day.
Bats always turn left when exiting a cave!
Men can read smaller print then women can; women can hear better.

Is someone getting ........................

LATEST WEDDING INVITATION
( Click pic to ENLARGE )

Today's SMS
From: Diwakar @ Tavant Technologies (Bangalore)

Geography & History usually inversely proportional
A girl with good geography will have a bad history &
a girl with good history will have a bad geography

A laugh 2 start ur day
A large signboard says " ALCOHOL KILLS SLOWLY "
A Drunkard saw the sign & shouted: " SO WHAT? who's in a hurry?!"

Boy: I kept sending my lover a love letter everyday for 3 years!
Friend: then what happened....?
Boy: She married the courier boy :-(

A judge charged Rs 542.50 fine to a man in a rape case
Man asked : Why this 542 rupeed & 50 paise?
Judge replied: Rs.500 for Rape and 8.5% Entertainment tax

A couple had a fight one night
Going to bed husband said: "Goodnite mother of 3 kids"
Wife replied: "Good nite father of none"

Today's PHOTO

Believe it or not !!!
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In town, car accidents dont just happen to cars
From: Kiranmayi @ adecco (Bangalore)